After one week’s wait, I finally got notified I passed the COMPS. I felt so relieved and finally could take a deep breath and begin to look forward to the Commencement.
Passed the COMPS
God’s power is made perfect in weakness. He is so good and faithful. He forgave my laziness and weakness. He taught me a lesson that I should do my utmost in my part and should not avoid taking responsibilities.
It was a fluke that I passed. Yet by His amazing grace, I was approved to get a master’s degree. Let me remember how He blessed me in this case and keep improving on my weak points newly identified.
I praise Him and thank Him. With this grateful heart, nail the COM Theory final!
“4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. 8 Love never fails.”
In the farewell party for Yurong and Steven this Sunday, brothers and sisters from PSIF read different versions of “love”: English, Mandarin, Thai, and Japanese. Lots of touching moments and joy (especially the Thai sisters’ hip-hop-like Thai verses and Yusuke’s “yummy” end). How great is our God!
Farewell Party for Yurong and Steven with PSIF family
Well, what made me recall the experience was just now I read some encouraging words from Pastor Liu Zhixiong’s book 《不一样的人生》: ”我们自己看起来不配，我们看自己也觉得不象的一批人，主耶稣却说：“就是你们这些人，我要托付你们，让你们做我的代表；我愿意让你们在生命的周围，去演一场我所成就的救赎给世人看。”我一方面战兢恐惧，但一方面，对于神的期盼，我是充满了感激。“
How marvelous it is that God trusts us! Thinking of this, I suddenly remembered this Monday when I was reviewing the love verses I replaced “love” with “God” (as 1 John 4:8 says “God is love.”), then the verses became:
“God is patient, Godis kind. God does not envy, God does not boast, God is not proud. God does not dishonor others, he is not self-seeking, he is not easily angered, he keeps no record of wrongs. God does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. He always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Godnever fails.”
God is changing me: He is softening my heart and making it sensitive instead of sentimental. He is opening my eyes so that I can become aware not to “minimize oneself, maximize the difficulty, and forget God’ presence.”
The Merciful One blessed me to meet sister Lu this Sunday and read her testimony about the God-given position at Harvard yesterday. My tears bursted out and I was amazed by God’s peace, guidance and power during her application process. The verses she shared spoke to me as well because I myself is in a time of uncertainty and insecurity brought by school, job-seeking, and immigration status.
As I am writing, I suddenly realize all the burdens are put by myself. Facts are simply facts. It’s my attitude and thinking that make thing complicated. “It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery. (Galatians 5:1)” It’s stupidity to enslave myself again by earthly desires and self-doubt, or from deep inside, doubts about God’s love and mights.
1 Unless the Lordbuilds the house,
the builders labor in vain.
Unless the Lordwatches over the city,
the guards stand watch in vain.
2 In vain you rise early
and stay up late,
toiling for food to eat—
for he grants sleep to those he loves. (Psalm 127)
As a young Christian, I need God’s help and discipline to learn to trust Him more and surrender more. “Just do it.” should not be just a saying. So this morning, I am starting with thanksgiving again — because of Him, all is well, and all shall be well.
You touched my heart again the moment I learned there’s a place in your heart where you leave only for me, as John and Stasi said in their book “Captivating: A Guided Journal: Unveiling the Mystery of a Woman’s Soul.” My heart trembled, eyes damped. No earthly romance can compare with Your pure and everlasting love for me, and for me only.
Oh my, I am Your one and only! I could do nothing but bow down and kiss your feet.
Your knew me before I was born, loved me at first sight, pursued me when I was wandering among the crowds, found me when I almost couldn’t love myself anymore, and claimed me Yours from the beginning to the end.
Then you never stop holding me tight, even though I’ve been rebellious all the time. You remian a faithful lover and bridegroom while I still try to fill my thirst and hunger for you with the world’s attention, affirmation, adoration and comfort. I betrayed you, yet You still love me.
How did you make it?
I learned not to have expectations for man, not to believe people can love unconditionally, and not to trust others completely — “They only bring you disappointment.”
Yet You taught me today that those are all Satan’s lies. He hurt me because He is envious of the blessings You want to give me, the beauty You designed me to be, and the glory You’re shining on me.
You told me You cherish me as a priceless jewel. And this is how you are fulfilling your promise: You opened my heart and made it tender and sensitive so that I could savor the beautiful music from The Head and the Heart. You made my heart beat by singing these melody for me. Oh, LORD!
You are beautiful!
“Heaven Go Easy on Me”
God, what are we doin’?
Can’t live this way forever
Gotta make ourselves some money
Or be thrown out with the bathwaterMy sister and my brother
Look to me for answers
And our fathers and our mothers
Wanna know they raised us right
Wanna know they raised us rightIs it that the good life is the simple one
(Sittin’ in the lawn watchin’ leaves go by)
Readin’ good books and playin’ songsWatchin’ the wind blow through your front yard
Don’t follow your head
Follow your heart
And while you’re sittin’ all alone in your room on your bed
And your windows are open but you won’t go out, no
Ah, heaven go easy on me
And while you’re sittin’ all alone in your room on your bed
And your windows are open but you won’t go out, no
Ah, heaven go easy on me
It’s damn good to’ve met you, I hope that you stay
We’re well on our way
We’re well on our way
We’re well on our way
We’re well on our way
We’re well on our way
We’re well on our way
We’re well on our way
We’re well on our way
We’re well on our way
We’re well on our way
(All these things are rushing by)
(All these things are rushing by)
(All these things are rushing by)
(All these things are rushing by)
(All these things are rushing by) [continued in background]
All things must end, darlin’
All things must end, darlin’
All things must end, darlin’
All things must end, darlin’
(All these things are rushing by)
(All these things are rushing by)
This post was inspired by the article in the New York Times written by Cal Newport, author of “So Good They Can’t Ignore You”. He says:
“Growing up, we were told by guidance counselors, career advice books, the news media and others to “follow our passion.” This advice assumes that we all have a pre-existing passion waiting to be discovered. If we have the courage to discover this calling and to match it to our livelihood, the thinking goes, we’ll end up happy.
There's no perfect choice on this earth. Career, relationship, investment, you name it, nothing will always work out. Yet as long as we invite God to take complete control, we can be assured that nothing will be out of control. The courage of "Just do it" comes from the faith in God. Take a leap of faith and figure things out by trying with growing patience and passion.
Joy is a choice. The level of joy you experience is completely and totally up to you. It is not dependent on anyone else — what they don or don’t do, how they behave or don’t behave. Joy cannot be manipulated by the actions of puny human beings. It is not dependent on the amount of sadness or suffering or difficulties you endure. Joy cannot be held hostage to fear, pain, anger, disappointment, sadness, or grief. At the end of any given day, the amount of joy you experienced is the exact amount of jot you chose to experience. You, my friend, are in charge. The sooner you embrace this pivotal reality, the sooner you can begin to live a more joyful life. — Choose Joy by Kay Warren
Things don’t seem to work out recently. “But it’s ok,” I would pretend to behave like this.
I am not cool inside.
I really want to know how you dealt with a breakup, a loss of family member, a challenge in school or career, or financial loss? How did the Holy Spirit work in your life to make you stronger? How did you submit yourself to God?
Praise God for His music! In today Sunday’s service, the choir of Chinese Bible Church of Greater Boston City Outreach Ministry (CBCGB COM) sang a hymn to express thankfulness to the Holy One, who sent His son to die for our sins so that we can gain eternal life and experience unfailing love of God.
Fun fact is all the sopranos (Elena Xu, Praise Xu and I) are studying public relations at Boston University College of Communication. I don’t really know if it is just a coincidence or it has some meaning in it, but I know God arranged everything because He loves us. Give thanks to him!
What are the hymns did your church sing today? Which hymn do you sing most frequently?
