What’s your primary love language?

The Five Love Languages Singles Edition“I just finished reading the first chapter of The Five Love Languages Singles Edition,” Peng, my best buddy since high school, messaged me early this morning.

“Yay! So proud of you! Any takeaway?” I was so excited abut his quick reaction after I recommended his the book yesterday.

“I probably know what your primary love language is,” said Peng. “Is it ‘action of service’?”

“Sorry, it’s not,” I answered with a smile as I already knew he would guess wrong according to my experiences (But why is it so hard for a guy to understand what a girl is thinking?). “Mine is sometimes ‘words of affirmation’ and sometimes ‘physical touch.’ But I’m pretty sure ‘words of affirmation’ is your primary love language.”

“Bingo! You got it,” replied Peng, “You’re always right. It’s a shame that you know me better than I know myself.” Well, he finally spoke my primary love language.

Then, primed by the loving messages, our one-hour discussion finished with “I miss you and I love you,” which is uncommon among Chinese people, even for the young generations. However, this practice of “receiving love by giving” really worked out. I thought he would fall sleep with a content heart, knowing more clearly that I care about him and cherish our friendship. For me, I gained a sense of fulfillment because I extended our communication to a deeper level while bringing happiness to my friend. Moreover, I felt so loved as he spoke my love languages and tried to learn more about them, even though the “physical touch” one is unrealistic because of the distance between Shenzhen and Boston.

My friend, what your primary love language is? Words of affirmation, gift, act of service, physical touch, or quality time? What are your loved ones’? Have you spoken their love languages to express your care for them? Have you told them what your primary love language is? If not, why not start now? Start with your own first and identify your love ones’. You’ll find how much love you are having after you figure out others’ love languages and how much love you can offer by speaking theirs.

Remember Jesus told us to “Love your neighbor as yourself”? God will bless us as we put His words into action.


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